Much Ado About Nothing
by Izzy1
Summary: A crazy author drags the g-boys & co. into Shakespeare's classic-Much Ado About Nothing.
1. Casting

Much Ado About Nothing: Casting  
By Izzy  
Rating G  
  
Hey! It's me again! Just to all of you who reviewed my last fic (In the End. Everyone else R&R.): *sniff* *sniff* ya'll are so SWEET. Thank you a lot. That was my first fic and it really means a lot to me.  
I don't own Gundam Wing (I wish I did) or Much Ado About Nothing. That belongs to Shakespeare (duh.) But he's my favorite author so I thought I'd have a little fun. Here's the casting special. Enjoy!  
  
It's a bright and sunny day as all the Gundam characters gather up the author, Izzy's fic to Much Ado About Nothing. Everyone is really hectic.   
IZZY: Everyone, listen up! I'm gonna start casting and if you don't like the characters you get, tough!!!  
WUFEI: Injustice! How can a woman order us around?  
IZZY: Look, I'm the author. I can make you do anything I want. Now if you want to keep all your teeth, I suggest you shut up and sit down.  
WUFEI: How exactly are you gonna knock all my teeth out, woman?!?  
IZZY: Oh Sailor Neptune! Sailor Uranus! *Sailor Uranus and Neptune enter, arms crossed.*  
WUFEI: *Pouts and takes a seat in the corner of the room.*  
IZZY: *Puts on a huge smile and turns to everyone else.* Any more questions?  
Everyone: *answers with a quick* NO!  
TROWA and CATHRINE: *sits down next to each other on the couch.*  
DUO: *smiles evilly before sitting on the arm chair and pulling Hilde down on top of him.*  
HILDE: *falls on Duo and takes a seat on his lap*  
RELENA: *takes a seat down at the table.*  
MILLIARDO and DOROTHY: *sits down next to Relena*  
SALLY and NOIN: *sits at the table across from Relena.*  
HEERO: *sits in the corner near Wufei.*  
SAILOR URANUS and NEPTUNE: *remain standing next to each other.*  
IZZY: Now that everyone is settled, let's get down to business. First of all Wufei, you're gonna be Don Pedro, pince of Arragon.  
WUFEI: *looks up at author, then to Sailor Uranus and Neptune with a little fear in his eyes, and just nods.*  
DUO: Why does he get to be the prince?  
IZZY: Because I think you'll like the part I casted for you. *walks up to Duo to whisper in his ear.* Besides, you get to kiss Hilde ...  
DUO: *obviously satisfied with the answer, settles back in his seat.*  
IZZY: Now, for Don John, Don Pedro's illegitimate brother, I casted Trowa.  
TROWA: *simply nods*  
IZZY: Great. You're all cooperating nicely. Now Duo, you get to be Claudio, a young lord of Florence.  
DUO: The dude's name is Claudio?!?  
IZZY: Yes, his name is Claudio. *walks up to him to whisper again.* Do you want to kiss Hilde or not?  
DUO: *quiets down yet again.*  
IZZY: Now, where was I? Oh yes, now Heero ... *looks down at casting sheet*  
HEERO: *obviously interested now that his part has come up, sits up straighter in his seat*  
IZZY: You will be Benedick, a young lord of Padua.  
DUO: *bursts out laughing*  
SAILOR URANUS: Now what exactly is so funny?  
DUO: *getting a little scared tries to calm his giggles down* But Heero ... his character's name sounds like 'been a dick.'  
QUATRE: *finally catching on, begins to giggle along until Sailor Neptune steps in front of him with a mean look on her face.*  
IZZY: Now, now, Neptune. Let's leave Quatre here alone.  
SAILOR NEPTUNE and URANUS: *walks back to original spot*  
IZZY: *gives Quatre a little kiss on the lips before continuing*  
DUO: No fair, Quatre; you are such an author's pet.  
HILDE, RELENA, DOROTHY, SALLY, NOIN and CATHRINE: DUO! SHUT UP!  
IZZY: Now, Treize, you get to be Leonato, the governor of Messina.  
MILLIARDO: Why can't I be the governor of Messina????  
IZZY: Because ... you get to be his brother, Antonio.  
MILLIARDO: Well, I guess that's okay. Besides, Antonio is a pretty cool name, wouldn't you agree Noin? *smiles seductively*  
IZZY: Okay, stop that now. No mushy stuff. If anybody's gonna get a kiss, it's gonna be me.  
EVERYONE: *grumbles*  
IZZY: Uranus? Neptune? Can you see if our little friends have a problem?  
SAILOR URANUS and NEPTUNE: *starts to get to work*  
EVERYONE: *immediately shuts up*  
IZZY: Good. Sally, there aren't many girl characters so you're gonna have to be Balthasar.  
SALLY: Baltha-what?  
IZZY: Balthasar. He's the attendant on Don Pedro, who is *looks down at sheet* Wufei.   
SALLY: Oh ... Oh! *quickly casts a smile over at Wufei who returns a small one.*  
IZZY: Dorothy, Noin, you guys get to be the followers of Don John. Dorothy.  
DOROTHY: Why do I have to be a small part? I'm not follower material. I have a much better acting ability than-  
NOIN: *clamps hand over Dorothy's mouth*  
IZZY: uh huh. *mutters to herself* Tell that to those eyebrows of yours. *puts on huge smile and looks up.*   
NOIN: Please, continue.  
IZZY: Thank you, Noin. That was very thoughtful of you, shutting Dorothy up like that. I was about to sic Uranus on her. *turns to Dorothy* You should be thanking Noin. She saved your tail.  
DOROTHY: *smiles sweetly back at author*  
IZZY: Dorothy, you get to be Borachio.  
DOROTHY: I get a small part and have to be a guy, too!  
IZZY: Tough. Get over it. But ya know what, everyone, if you squint your eyes and look at Dorothy a certain angle, she sort of looks like a guy.  
EVERYONE: *squints eyes and looks over at Dorothy.*  
CATHRINE: I can sort of see it.  
HILDE: Yeah! Yeah, I can see it!  
RELENA: Okay guys, let's stop. Dorothy really doesn't need all this attention.  
IZZY: My words exactly, Relena. We all don't need to die from looking at her face! (AN: I guess you guys can tell I hate Dorothy's guts.)  
EVERYONE: *bursts into little giggles*  
DOROTHY: You are such a jerk, author-lady!  
IZZY: *turns and glares at her* You make me SO ANGRY! Uranus, get her!  
URANUS: *runs after Dorothy attempting to attack her*  
DOROTHY: *is up and out of her seat running from Uranus like her hair is on fire*  
IZZY: Noin, your character is Conrade. Next on my list is ... Quatre.  
QUATRE: Okay. Who do I get to be?  
IZZY: You get to be Friar Francis. Any problems?  
QUATRE: Nope.  
IZZY: Okay. Cathrine, you get to be Dogberry, the constable.  
CATHRINE: Okay ...  
IZZY: Just do it. I'm getting a headache. Anybody got an aspirin?  
QUATRE: As a matter of face, I do. Here ya go, Izzy-chan.  
IZZY: Why thank you Quatre-chan. This is very sweet of you.  
QUATRE: *blushes*  
IZZY: *takes pill and washes it down with a glass of water that Quatre also handes her* Now, the Sexton and the boy will be played by ... the Sexton and the boy as will all messengers, etc. will be played by themselves.  
HILDE: What's a Sexton?  
SALLY: Yeah. What is a Sexton?  
IZZY: Well, it's an employee of a church who is responsible for the maintenance of church property.  
RELENA: Wow ... you must be really smart.  
IZZY: Yeah, well ... *hides Webster's dictionary behind back*  
HEERO: *spots dictionary*  
IZZY: *glares at Heero* Hilde, you're up next!  
HILDE: Great!  
IZZY: You get to be Hero, may I add in with only one 'e', Leonato's daughter.  
DOROTHY: *coming to a panting stop* Wait a sec. She gets to be a girl and I don't?  
IZZY: Neptune, would you like to join the chase?  
SAILOR NEPTUNE: Oh, no problem! *runs after Dorothy with Uranus who screams in fright*  
IZZY: Beatrice, Leonato's niece and Antonio's daughter will be ... Relena.  
RELENA: *puts on a huge smile*  
NOIN: Good going, Relena!  
DUO: *snickering* What kind of sexual favors have you done for the author lately, Relena?  
MILLIARDO: *looks about ready to kill*  
TREIZE and NOIN: *hold Milliardo back*  
HEERO: *grabs his gun out of some unknown place and shoves it at the back of Duo's head* Omae o korosu.  
IZZY: *freaking out a bit* Okay! Stop it! Relena did not do any sexual favors for me! Duo, you've got a sick mind! *grabs Heero's gun and locks it in a drawer* Down Heero, down. *pulls Heero by the hand and sits him down in his seat*  
HEERO: *as soon as the author turns her back, he lunges for Duo's neck and starts to squeeze*  
DUO: *squeaking out for help* Uh ... author lady, a little help here ...  
IZZY: Heero! *takes him by the hand yet again and sits him down in his seat ... yet again. This time though she makes a seat for herself in his lap* Now you can't get up. See what you've gotten yourself into.  
HEERO: *glares at Izzy*  
RELENA: *puts on a frown*  
IZZY: Lastly are the attendants on Hero.  
SALLY: Who's gonna play them?  
TROWA: Yeah, there's no one left.  
IZZY: Wrong! Ursula will be played by Sailor Uranus and Margaret will be played by Sailor Neptune. Is that okay with everyone?  
EVERYONE: Sure.  
IZZY: Great! For being so cooperative, you all get a kiss! *she turns around to give Heero a quick peck then went around giving everyone else a kiss (except Dorothy of course who had stopped running.) She lastly stops at Quatre who pulled her in and they fell over kissing, leaving the rest staring and Dorothy fuming.  
  
That's it for the casting! Didn't mean to make it so long! It's just casting! But anywayz I had to get Dorothy at the end there. Quatre is MINE! Every1 back off!!!  
R&R,  
Izzy-chan  



	2. Act I, Scene I

Much Ado About Nothing: Act I, Scene I  
By Izzy  
Rated G  
  
Hey everyone! I've gots a lot of time on my hands and is sort of at a stump for more fics. I wanna write a sort of saga. If you've got any ideas write it out in detail and send it to prncssprsfne@yahoo.com. And some peeps asked for a sequel to 'In the End.' I'm at a block. Any ideas? Email them to me too. Thanks a lot. Oh yeah, the g-boys & co. do not belong to me. Neither does Much Ado About Nothing. As if you didn't know. And this doesn't have as much humor it in. Sorry. I was just concentrating on figuring out the english meaning of everything they were saying. it was very hard. Go read the casting but i'll give you the rundown now:  
  
Don Pedro (prince of Arragon): Wufei  
Don John (Don Pedro's brother): Trowa  
Claudio (young lord of Florence): Duo  
Benedick (young lord of Padua): Heero  
Leonato (governor of Messina): Treize  
Antonio (Leonato's brother): Milliardo  
Balthasar (attendant on Don Pedro): Sally  
Conrade (follower of Don John): Noin  
Borachio (follower of Don John): Dorothy  
Friar Francis: Quatre  
Dogberry (the constable): Cathrine  
Hero (daughter to Leonato): Hilde  
Beatrice (daughter to Antonio): Relena  
Margaret (attendant on Hero): Sailor Neptune  
Ursula (attendant on Hero): Sailor Uranus   
  
**Sailor Neptune and Uranus are there to basically keep everyone in control but since there was no one left I gave them parts. Also, extras will be played by themselves. i.e. the boy will be played by the boy, the sexton will be played by the sexton. Now on with the show!!!  
  
IZZY: Everyone! Listen up! Do you have your scripts. You were supposed to memorize your lines last night. So you better have it down. We're gonna begin practice, okay? Act I, scene I: in front of Leonato's house. Treize, Hilde, Relena: you're on! Somebody get the messenger onto stage!  
DUO: *throws messenger onto stage*  
TREIZE, HILDE, and RELENA: *shuffle onto stage*  
IZZY: *sits down in director's chair labeled 'Izzy-chan' on the back* Action!  
TREIZE/LEONATO: In this letter, *gestures to letter in hand* I learn that Don Pedro of Arragon will arrive here in Messina tonight.  
MESSENGER: He is very near right now.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: I also learn that Don Pedro has bestowed much honor on Claudio, a Florentine.  
MESSENGER: Honor is deserved on both parts.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Has Signior Mountanto returned from the wars, or no? ... um, Izzy-chan, what does 'mountanto' mean?  
IZZY: *sighs* You guys were doing great. Why'd you have to stop?  
TREIZE and HILDE: *glare at Relena*  
IZZY: Mountanto is a fencing term for an upward thrust. *hides dictionary again*  
RELENA: Oh.  
IZZY: Keep on going.  
MESSENGER: I don't know anyone of that name.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Who do you mean, niece?  
HILDE/HERO: My cousin, Beatrice, means Signior Benedick of Padua.  
MESSENGER: Oh! He's returned and as pleasant as ever.  
RELENA: How many has he killed in these wars?  
MESSENGER: He has done good service, my lady.  
DUO: *interrupting* Why the heck would she want to know how many people Benedick killed?  
IZZY: Duo. Shut up. Please, continue.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Sir, you must not mistake my niece. There is a kind of war between Signior Benedick and Her. They never meet without a clash of wit.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: In our last conflict, four of his five wits went halting off. Four of five?  
IZZY: Relena, you really like interruptions, don't you? The five wits are common wit, imagination, fantasy, judgment and memory. Now keep on going.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Now there is little difference between him and his horse. Who is his companion now? He has a new sworn brother every month.  
MESSENGER: Is it possible?  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Quite. His faith is like his hat; it changes with the next block.  
MESSENGER: I see he is not in your books.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: If he was I would burn my study. Now, who?  
MESSENGER: He is in company of the noble Claudio. Look! Don Pedro is approaching.  
IZZY: *turns around only to see the rest of the group playing spin the bottle on the polished oak wood floor. Milliardo and Noin are making out and haven't come up for air in the last five minutes. Dorothy is about to kiss Quatre who looks quite terrified* Everyone, stop doing that. No more kissing today!  
DOROTHY: *ignores Izzy and continues to try to kiss Quatre*  
IZZY: Dorothy! The rules don't exclude you.  
DOROTHY: *keeps on ignoring*  
IZZY: Sailor Uranus, a little help.  
SAILOR URANUS: *grabs Dorothy and ties her to a chair and puts a piece of tape over her mouth*  
IZZY: *turns away only to see Milliardo and Noin still going at it* Neptune!  
SAILOR NEPTUNE: *walks up to Milliardo and Noin and taps them on the shoulder. They ignore her and she yells in their ears to stop. They can't hear her and with the help of Trowa and Quatre, she manages to wrench them away from each other*  
MILLIARDO and NOIN: *blush the deepest red you can imagine*  
IZZY: Now put that bottle up!  
QUATRE: *puts bottle up*  
IZZY: Thank you very much Quatre. Wufei, Trowa, Duo, Heero and Sally-you're on! Wufei-it's your line.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Hello, Signior Leonato! Is this your daughter?  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Her mother has told me so many times.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Were you in doubt, sir, that you asked her?  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No, Signior Benedick.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Truly, the lady fathers herself.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: If Signior Leonato is not her father, she would not have his head on her shoulder for all Messina to see.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Why are you still talking, Signior Benedick?; nobody marks you.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: What, my dear Lady Disdain! are you yet living?  
DUO: Duh! She's right in front of him!  
IZZY: *impatiently* He knows that. He's being sarcastic.  
HILDE: *walks over and gives Duo's braid a good tug*  
RELENA: What does-  
IZZY: I know, I know, what does 'disdain' mean? Gawd, don't they teach you anything in those fancy schools of yours?  
RELENA: *opens her mouth to answer*  
IZZY: *cuts her off* Don't even answer-I don't want to know. Disdain is a display of contempt and scornful aloofness.  
RELENA: So he basically just insulted me?  
IZZY: He did more than insult you-he dissed you good!  
RELENA/BEATRICE: *scratches head in thought* 'Doesn't insult and dis mean the same thing? Oh well.' Courtesy must change to disdain if you come in her presence.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: It is certain that I am loved of all ladies, except you, and still, I have a hard heart; for truly, I love no one.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than hear a man swear he loves me.  
MILLIARDO: *forgetting this is still a play, he nods his head in approval of her last remark*  
NOIN: *smacks Milliardo in the back of his head* Shhh!  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Signior Benedick, Signior Claudio, we will stay a month. Signior Leonato is no hypocrite; he prays from the heart.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Let me bid you welcome.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: I thank you.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Will you lead on, your Grace?  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Your hand, Leonato; we will go together.  
IZZY: Good. Not so bad for the first time. Now everyone leaves except for Heero and Duo.  
EVERYONE (except for Heero and Duo): *leaves the stage*  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Benedick, did you note Leonato's daughter?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I did not note her, but I looked upon her.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Isn't she modest?  
EVERYONE: *stares at Duo, not believing what is coming out of his mouth even though they know it's just acting*  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Do you want me to speak honestly or as a professed tyrant of their sex?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Sober judgment, please.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: She is quite plain; I do not like her.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: You think I'm playing; tell me how you like her.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Would you buy her?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Can the world buy such a jewel?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Yes, and a case to put it in.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: She is the sweetest lady I ever looked upon.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I can still see without glasses and I do not see that: her cousin, Beatrice, if she did not have fury, exceeds her much in beauty as the first of May doth the last of December. *blushes at the thought of saying that about Relena* You have no intent of turning husband do you?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I will, if Hero will be my wife.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Look, Don Pedro has come to see you.  
IZZY: Wufei! You're back on!  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: What secret has held you here?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Claudio is in love with Hero, Leonato's short daughter.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: If you love her, amen. The lady is very well worthy.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: You speak this to fetch me in.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: I spoke my mind.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: And I spoke mine.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: And I spoke mine.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: That I love her.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: That she is worthy.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: That fire cannot melt out of me. I will die in it at the stake. A woman conceived me, I thank her; she brought me up, I thank her; but I will not trust any. I will live a bachelor.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: I will see you pale with love.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Never love. If I ever lose more blood with love than drinking-  
DUO: Drinking? How can you lose blood drinking?  
IZZY: Duo?  
DUO: Yeah?  
IZZY: Shut up.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: If I ever lose more blood with love than drinking, pick my eyes out with a ballad-maker's pen, and hang me up at the door for a sign of blind Cupid.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: You prove a notable argument.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: If I do, hang me in a bottle and shoot me. Then let them signify: Here is Benedick, the Married Man. So I leave you.  
IZZY: Wonderful job, Heero! How did you become so good at acting?  
HEERO: I only am if I want to be.  
IZZY: Glad to know you like the play.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: You may do me good, Highness. Does Leonato have a son?  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Only Hero; she's his only heir. Do you love her?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Very much. The return from war is prompting me to how fair Hero is.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: I will broach it with her and her father, and you shall have her.  
IZZY: Great!!! You know, all you guys can act well, too. That's it. Take five, then we're onto the next two scenes.  
  
That was probably the longest scene is Shakespearean history. Gosh! Five pages. This is only one frigging scene! It was eight pages in the book. The next scene is only one and scene three is two pages. I'm gonna combine the next two. Review please. Thanks a lot for reading this disaster.  
  
Izzy-chan  
  
  



	3. Act I, Scenes II & III

Much Ado About Nothing: Act I, Scene II and III  
By Izzy  
Rated PG (the author loses it a bit in one part.)  
  
This is what happens when it's raining outside and I'm bored. More parts. At least I'm making it a priority to finish the story no matter how much it sucks. Oh well. I basically just want to tell the story. More drama-less humor again. Sorry. There's really no humor in Much Ado About Nothing. Oh yeah-that doesn't belong to me. It belongs to Shakespeare-duh. And the g-boys & co. don't belong to be either. On with the show. I'm not gonna do a listing of the characters. I'll just put their names beside the names. Like this:   
RELENA/BEATRICE. Okay? On with the show ...  
  
IZZY: Act I, scene II. I don't expect as many interruptions, got it? *glares*  
EVERYONE: *nods, casting frightened faces at Uranus and Neptune*  
IZZY: Good. Treize and Milliardo, you're on.  
TREIZE and MILLIARDO: *quickly gets on the stage*  
IZZY: Act I, scene II: a room in Leonato's house. Action!  
TREIZE/LEONATO: How now, brother! Where is your son? Didn't he provide this music?  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: He-is-very-busy. But-I-  
IZZY: *interrupting, head in hands, then explodes* Milliardo! You are not a frigging machine! I know you've spent a lot of time with mobile suits-probably more time with them than with Noin-but that's no excuse! Get it right.  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: Okay. But-I-  
IZZY: NOW!  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: I'll try. But-I-  
IZZY: *glares*  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: *deep breath* But, brother, I have strange news.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Continue.  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: The prince discovered that Count Claudio loves my niece-your daughter-and will broach it with her and then you.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Has the fellow that told you any wit?  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: A very sharp fellow. You may question him yourself.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No, no. We will hold it a dream until the time comes. But I will tell Hero-she will be prepared with an answer.  
IZZY: Good, Milliardo. Keep it up. Exit both of you. Scene III. Let's see. *glances down at script* Trowa and Noin-your turn.  
TROWA and NOIN: *take positions*  
IZZY: Scene III: same room. Action!  
NOIN/CONRADE: Why are you so sad, Lord?  
TROWA/DON JOHN: There is no occasion to be happy.  
NOIN/CONRADE: Can you make no use of your discontent?  
TROWA/DON JOHN: I make use of it, for only I use it. Who comes here?  
IZZY: *turns around* Uranus, untie Dorothy, please. She's up.  
SAILOR URANUS: *unties Dorothy*  
DOROTHY: *walks past Izzy, head held high*  
IZZY: *smirks and sticks her leg out*  
DOROTHY: *comes crashing down to the floor*  
IZZY: Okay, now on with the show! *looks down* Dorothy, sweetie, get yourself off the floor and onto the stage!  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: *smiles sweetly* It is I, Borachio. The prince, your brother is entertained by Leonato. I can tell you of an intended marriage.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Who?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Your brother's right hand man.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Who? Claudio?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Yes, he.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: And who?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Hero, the daughter and heir of Leonato. I overheard from Don Pedro and Claudio that the prince will woo Hero for himself and then give her to Count Claudio.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: This may prove food to my displeasure. If I can cross Don Pedro any way I bless myself every way. You both will assist me?  
NOIN/CONRADE: To the death, Lord.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Shall we go prove what's to be done?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: We'll wait upon your lordship.  
IZZY: Oooh! That Don John has a lot of spare time on his hands. Oh well. We'll meet here tomorrow, same time, for the next act.  
  
That's right! The next act. Act II! Act I is over! Yeah! Review please. I still would like ideas for a saga fic and ideas for a sequel to 'In the End.' Email everything to prncssprsfne@yahoo.com. Thanks a lot everyone for reading this piece of junk.  
  
Izzy-chan  
  



	4. Act II, Scene I

Much Ado About Nothing: Act II, Scene I  
By Izzy  
Rated G  
  
I really have no idea why I'm continuing on with this. It's just a frigging waste of time. Shakespeare is really getting on my nerves. Oh well. Here it is:  
  
IZZY: We've finished one act. Don't get your undies in a bunch. We've still got four more acts to go. Most of the scenes are long too. Gurr! Okay, sorry. Um, your costumes are coming in next rehearsal. Okay? Let's begin. Who's up? *looks down at script* Treize, Milliardo, Hilde and Relena. You're on. I hope you guys memorized your lines to this scene. It's ten pages long. Act II, scene I: a hall in Leonato's house. You're all wearing masks because of the ball. Action!  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Was Count John here at supper?  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: I didn't see him.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: How sharply that man looks! I never can see him but I am heart-burned an hour after.  
HILDE/HERO: He is a very melancholy man.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: He would be an excellent man if he was made half-way between him and Benedick. He is too like an image and says nothing, and Benedick is every-more tattling.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Then half Signior Benedick's tongue in Count John's mouth-  
DUO: *bursts out laughing*  
SAILOR URANUS: *glares at him*  
SAILOR NEPTUNE: Why are you laughing this time?  
DUO: Well, it sounds as if Relena wants Heero to make out with Trowa.  
IZZY: God, Duo, you can be such an idiot sometimes. What she's trying to say is that it would be better for Count John to be more talkative. Figure it out for yourself. Keep on going, Treize.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Then half Signior Benedick's tongue in Count John's mouth, and half Count John's melancholy in Signior Benedick's face-  
RELENA/BEATRICE: With a good leg and a good foot, uncle, and enough money and he could win any woman in the world if he could get her good will.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Niece, you would get yourself a husband if you weren't so shrewd.  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: In faith, she is too curst.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: If God sends me no husband, I will bless him upon my knees every morning.  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: (To Hero) Well, niece, I trust you will be ruled by your father.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Yes, it is my cousin's duty to say 'Father, as it pleases you.' But yet, she will never say 'Father, as it pleases me.'  
TREIZE/LEONATO: The revelers are entering, brother: make good room.  
IZZY: Good! Relena-no interruptions! You're improving! Wufei, Duo, Heero, Sally, Trowa, Dorothy, Sailor Uranus and Neptune-you all are on.  
ALL MENTIONED: *takes positions*  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Lady, will you walk about with your friend.  
HILDE/HERO: I am yours for the walk, especially when I walk away.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: With me in your company?  
HILDE/HERO: I may say so, when I please.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: And when will you please to say so?  
HILDE/HERO: When I like your favor.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Speak low if you speak love. *draws her aside*  
DUO: *even though he knows it's all fake, he's fuming at the sight of Hilde with Wufei*  
SALLY: Izzy, wait a sec. I'm supposed to flirt with Sailor Neptune all through this next part.  
IZZY: I know. Sorry, sorry. Just pretend you're a guy.  
SALLY: *deep breath in* Fine.  
SALLY/BALTHASAR: Well, I would if you did like me.  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: I wouldn't; I have many ill qualities.  
SALLY/BALTHASAR: Tell me one.  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: Well, I say my prayers out loud.  
SALLY/BALTHASAR: I love you the better.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Will you not tell me who told you so?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: No, you will pardon me.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Will you tell me who you are?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Not now.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: This is because I am disdainful and have good wit out of the 'Hundred Merry Tales'-well Signior Benedick said so.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I don't understand this. Why does she ask who I am?  
IZZY: Because!!! You're wearing masks!!! Duh!  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Oh. Who is he?  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Oh I'm sure you know Signior Benedick well enough.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Not I, believe me.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Why, he's the prince's jester: a very dull fool; only his gift is in devising impossible slanders: none but libertines delight in him; for he both pleases men and angers them, and then they laugh at him and beat him.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: When I know the gentleman, I'll tell him what you say.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Do, do: he'll break a comparison on me. *Music strikes up* We must follow the leader. *begins to dance*  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Sure, my brother is amorous on Hero, and will break it to her father. The ladies follow Hero, and but one visor remains.  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: And that is Claudio: I know him by his bearing.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Are you Signior Benedick?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I am he.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Sir you are very near my brother in his love: he is enamored on Hero; I ask you, dissuade him from her: she is not equal to him: you may do the part of an honest man in it.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: How do you know he loves her? Wait a sec-Izzy, please explain this scene.  
IZZY: Now, it's your turn to be interrupting. Gawd, Relena-you're contagious! You're pretending to be Benedick so that Don John doesn't know you're Claudio because he says that Don Pedro is in love with Hero.  
DUO: Whatever.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: I heard him swear it.  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: So did I; he swore he would marry her tonight.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Come, let's go to the banquet.  
IZZY: Okay, Dorothy and Trowa. You guys exit now.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I answered in the name of Benedick, but I hear these news with the ears of Claudio. It's true: the prince wooes for himself, not me. Farewell, Hero!  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Claudio?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Yea, the same.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Will you come with me?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Where?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Outside. The prince has got your Hero.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I wish him joy of her.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Do you think the prince would have served you like this?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Please, leave me alone.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Now you blame the messenger.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Fine, I'll leave you.  
IZZY: Duo, you exit.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Poor fowl! Oh well. I'm surprised Lady Beatrice should not recognize me. The prince's jester! Ha! Well, I'll be revenged.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Signior, where's Claudio?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I told him that you have gotten the good will of his young lady.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Look, here comes Claudio, Beatrice, Hero and Leonato.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: You have no employment for me?  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: None, but the desire for your company.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Oh, here's a dish I do not love; I cannot endure Lady Tongue. *exits*  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Come, Lady Beatrice, you have lost the heart of Signior Benedick. You put him down, lady, you put him down.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I would not have if he had not me. I brought Count Claudio whom you sent me to seek.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Count Claudio! Why are you sad?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Not sad, Lord.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Then sick?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Not either.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: He is civil, or somewhat jealous.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: I have won fair Hero and broke it with her father. Name the day of marriage and Hero is yours!  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Speak, Count, it's your cue.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Hero, you are mine as I am yours. I give myself away for you.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Speak, cousin, or stop is mouth with a kiss and let him not speak either.  
HILDE/HERO: *kisses Duo*  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: In faith, Beatrice, you have a merry heart.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Yes, my lord, I thank it. My cousin tells him in his ear that he is in her heart.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: So she does.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Thus goes everyone to the world. I may sit in a corner and cry for a husband.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Lady Beatrice, I will get you one.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I would rather have one of your father's getting.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Will you have me, lady?  
HEERO: *eyes blaze with anger*  
RELENA/BEATRICE: No, my lord. You have far too much work.  
HEERO: *calms down*  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Niece, you will look to the good of things?  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I cry you mercy, uncle. By your grace's pardon. *exits*  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: She cannot endure to hear of a husband.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No, no. She mocks all of her suitors.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: She would be an excellent wife for Benedick.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Oh, no, Lord. A week into the marriage, they would've talked themselves mad.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Claudio, when will the wedding be?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Tomorrow, lord.  
IZZY: *interrupting* Woo! Duo, a little frisky are we?  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Not till Monday, son. We will need time for the celebration.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Come, Claudio, we will undertake one of Hercules' labors; which is, to bring Signior Benedick and Lady Beatrice into love for each other. Will you all help?  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Of course, my Lord.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: And you, gentle Hero?  
HILDE/HERO: Of course, to help my cousin get a good husband.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Come with me and I will tell you my plan.  
IZZY: Great! Everyone, off the stage! That's it for now. I'll see all of you tomorrow! Okay?  
  
I need help for another HY/RP fic. You can tell me in the reviews or email them to prncssprsfne@yahoo.com. Thanks.  
  
Izzy-chan  
  
  



	5. Act II, Scenes II & III

Much Ado About Nothing, Act II, Scenes II and III  
By Izzy  
Rated PG  
  
I still want more ideas for a HY/RP fic. Tell me in the reviews or email them to prncssprsfne@yahoo.com. The g-boys & co. don't belong to me. Neither does Much Ado About Nothing. On with the show ...  
  
IZZY: Did you guys study the next act last night? Cause scene II and III of act II is nine pages long. We've got a lot of work on our hands. Oh yeah-your costumes came in last night. *hands each a box with their names tagged on* This is gonna be a dress rehearsal so go find a room and dress.  
10 MINUTES LATER ...  
DOROTHY: Who decided to make my costume BROWN?!?  
IZZY: *little horns show up* I have absolutely no idea ...  
DOROTHY: Hmph. This so totally clashes with my hair color.  
IZZY: *speaks in a low voice* Oh I know ...  
HEERO, DUO and ALL OTHER GUYS (except for Quatre): We have to wear tights?!?  
QUATRE: *laughs at other guys* I don't have to! I just have to wear this robe thing cause I'm the friar.  
IZZY: Hello ... This is supposed to be fourteenth century stuff. Be a man! You guys are such wusses!  
RELENA: *steps out of a room fully dressed in costume* I don't know ... it's not that bad.  
HEERO: *mouth drops open, but then he quickly shuts it*  
MILLIARDO: *sees Heero gawking at his sister and glares bullets into his back*  
RELENA: *is dressed in a lilac colored gown with a lace up front and three-fourth sleeves edged in heavy lace* (AN: descriptive enough for ya?)  
HILDE: *her dress is in the same style as Relena except hers is dark blue*  
DUO: *constantly stares at Hilde*  
HILDE: *upon spotting Duo, decides to flirt a little. She walks up to him, spins around in front of him to give him a full view* Do I look okay? I'm feeling a little uncomfortable. I've never worn anything like this before.  
DUO: *putting on his "trying-to-be-cool-but-I'm-not-quite-there-yet" look* Hilde, babe, you look great! It looks like you were born in the thing. Wait-you look more than great-you look wonderful!  
IZZY: *laughs* Uh huh. Hilde, hon, don't trust anything Duo says for a second although you do look pretty good. Duo?  
DUO: Yeah, Iz?  
IZZY: Try to get laid on your own time. 'Kay, sweetie?  
DUO: *shrinks back*   
NOIN: My costume isn't very different from my uniform.  
IZZY: Good, Cathrine, how's yours?  
CATHRINE: Good, I guess.  
IZZY: Wufei, how 'bout you?  
WUFEI: Whining is impertinent.  
IZZY: I'll take that as a 'fine.' I'm not even going to ask the rest of you. You're probably just gonna whine about the tights again. Now let's begin! Act II, scene II: a hall in Leonato's house. Trowa, Dorothy-you're on. Action!  
TROWA/DON JOHN: It is so; Count Claudio will marry the daughter of Leonato.  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Yes, Lord, but I can cross it.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: How can you cross this marriage?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: For a year, I have been in the favor of Margaret, a lady-in-waiting to Hero.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Yes, I remember.  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: I can get her to look out of Hero's chamber window.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: How can that kill this marriage?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Go to your brother and tell Don Pedro to tell Claudio that he has wronged his honor.  
TROWA/DON JOHN: What proof shall I make of that?  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Proof enough to misuse the prince, vex Claudio, undo Hero and kill Leonato. Go then to find an hour to draw Don Pedro and Claudio alone. Tell them you that that Hero loves me. Tell them you have discovered this and bring them to Hero's window where I will have called Margaret. I will fashion that Hero shall be absent. There will be truth that Hero is disloyal.  
TROW/DON JOHN: I will go learn of their wedding day.  
IZZY: Cut! Great-that's the end of the scene. *looks at Dorothy who looks upset* What's wrong Dorothy?  
DOROTHY: Why did you make me the bad guy? I have a feeling you don't like me much.  
IZZY: *evil laugh inside* Whatever gave you that idea? Now go sit with Sailor Uranus and Neptune and they'll keep you company. *whispers to Uranus and Neptune* Make sure she stays shut up.  
CATHRINE: Who's in the next scene?  
IZZY: Heero.   
HEERO: *gets up on stage*  
IZZY: Act II, scene III: Leonato's orchard. Action!  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Boy!  
IZZY: Somebody get the boy!  
WUFEI: *grabs the boy and pushes him in the direction of the stage*  
BOY: Signior?  
HEERO/BENEDICK: In my window lies a book: bring it to me.  
BOY: *exits*  
HEERO/BENEDICK: *upon seeing the prince and Claudio* Ha! The prince and Monsieur Love! I will hide myself. *hides*  
IZZY: Wufei, Duo and Treize-you guys are up!  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Come, shall we hear music?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Yes, my good lord.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: *whispers* Do you see where Benedick has hid himself?  
IZZY: Sally, come on in! And with the music!  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Come, Balthasar we'll hear that song again.  
IZZY: Now you exit Sally. Sorry it's short but that's it.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Come, Leonato. What did you tell me today, that your niece Beatrice was in love with Signior Benedick?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I never thought that lady would love any man.  
TREIZE/MILLIARDO: No, neither did I. But it is good that she loves Signior Benedick.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Is it possible?  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Has she made her affecton know to Benedick?  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No; and she swears she never will: that's her torment.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: It's true. So your daughters says, 'Shall I that have so often encountered him with scorn, write to him that I love him?'  
TREIZE/LEONATO: My daughter says Beatrice is up late at night to write on a sheet of paper.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Now you talk of a sheet of paper; I remember a pretty jest your daughter told us.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Oh that when she was reading Beatrice's lett she could Benedick and Beatrice between the sheet?  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Yes, that.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: She tore the letter into a thousand pieces and railed at herself, that she should be so immodest to write to one that she knew would mock her.  
RELENA: *blushes bright red*  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Then down upon her knees se falls, weeps, sobs, beats her heart, tears at her hair, prays; 'O sweet Benedick! God give me patience!'  
TREIZE/LEONATO: It is very true.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: It would be good if Benedick knew of it by some other.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: To what end? He would torment her and make jest of it.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: She is an excellent sweet lady; and she is virtuous.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: And exceedingly wise.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: In everything but loving Benedick.  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Never tell him.  
TREIZE/LEONATO: My lord, will you walk? Dinner is ready.  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Let us send her to call him in to dinner.  
IZZY: Wufei, Duo and Treize-you guys exit. Heero, come out of your hiding spot.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: This can't be a trick; they heard truth from Hero. They seem to pity her. Love me! Why, it must be requited. They say I will bear myself proudly. I did never think to marry: I must not seem proud. They say the lady is fair. I cannot render her wit no great argument for I will be terribly in love with her.  
HEERO: *blushes*  
RELENA: *blushes deeper than her*  
IZZY: *thinks something is up between the two*  
HEERO/BENEDICK: When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married. Here comes Beatrice. By this day! she's a fair lady: I do see some marks of love in her.  
IZZY: Relena!  
RELENA: *daydreams*  
IZZY: Releeena!  
RELENA: *continues to daydream*  
IZZY: RELENA!  
RELENA: OH! I'm up, right?  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Against my will, I am sent to bid you to come to dinner.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Fiar Beatrice, I thank you for your pains.  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I took no more pains for those thanks than you take pains to thank me: if it had been painful, I would not have come.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: You take pleasure in the message then?  
RELENA/BEATRICE: You have no stomach, signior: farewell.  
IZZY: Exit Relena.  
RELENA: *ignores Izzy again*  
IZZY: RELENA! YOU SAID FAREWELL. NOW FAREWELL YOUR BUTT OFF THAT STAGE!  
RELENA: Oops. Sorry, Izzy-chan.  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Ha! 'Against my will I am sent to bid you to come to dinner.' There's a double meaning. 'I took no more pains for those thanks than you took pains to thank me.' That's as much to say, Any pains that I take for you is as easy as thanks. If I do not talke pity on her, I am a villian just as I will be one too if I do not love her.  
IZZY: Exit now Heero and that's the end of the scene. Good job! Relena, off in la la land now are we? I don't care what you do when your out of here. Just pay attention on stage and remember your cues. PLEASE?!?  
RELENA: *blushes ... yet again* Sorry.  
  
That's it for Act II! Yeah! Oh well. Three more acts. *big sweat drop* Please review.  
  
Izzy-chan  
  



	6. Act III, Scenes III& IV

Much Ado About Nothing: Act III, Scene III and IV  
By Izzy  
Rated G  
  
I want to thank all who reviewed! I was gonna quit doing this but hey! I'm gonna finish after all. Just to whoever asked (I can't remember but you know who you are) but at the end there's a big Heero/Relena moment. Kay? Now here we go ...  
  
CATHRINE: Izzy-chan, wait a sec. Before we start practice, I was running through my parts and I noticed that you didn't cast one part.  
  
IZZY: I know, I know. Um, the person I casted for Verges, the headborough is Lady Une. She couldn't make it for the previous practices but she'll be here today.  
  
LADY UNE: Did you get my costume, Izzy?  
  
IZZY: Yep. Here. *Hands Lady Une a box with her name on the front.*  
  
10 MINUTES LATER ...  
  
IZZY: Does it fit you okay?  
  
LADY UNE: *is currently ignoring Izzy and flirting with Treize* What? Oh. Yeah, great.  
  
IZZY: Now let's begin. Lady Une, get your butt over here or you're gonna answer to Sailor Uranus and Neptune. Got it?  
  
LADY UNE: *salutes Izzy* Yes, sir!  
  
IZZY: Good. Cathrine, Une, we're gonna begin now. The first and second watches are up The Watch is up too. Act III, scene III: a street. Action!  
  
LADY UNE: The Watch?   
  
IZZY: Yeah. The First Watch. The Second Watch and the Watch. Just work with me.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Are you good men?  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: Yes, or it would be a pity that they should suffer salvation, body and soul.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: No, that punishment is too good for them, having being chosen for the prince's watch.  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: Give them your charge, Dogberry.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: First, who thinks who have what it takes to be constable?  
  
FIRST WATCH: Hugh Otecake, sir, or George Seacole; they can read and write.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Neighbor Seacole! God has blessed him with a good name, but to write and read comes by nature.  
  
SECOND WATCH: Both which-  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Well then, let them alone till they are sober: if they do not make you the better answer, you may say they are not the men you took them for.  
  
WATCH: Very well.  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: You have always been a merciful man, partner.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Truly, I would not hang a dog by my will, much more a man who has any honesty in him.  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: This is very true.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: If you meet the prince in the night, you may stay with him.  
  
IZZY: Dogberry, Verges, exit. Enter Borachio and Conrade. That's Dorothy and Noin!  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: What, Conrade!  
  
WATCH: Peace!  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Conrade!  
  
NOIN/CONRADE: I'm here.  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Did you here somebody?  
  
NOIN/CONRADE: No, it was just a vane on the house.  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: I wooed Margaret, Lady Hero's gentlewoman, tonight and she leaned out her mistress' chamber window and bid me a thousand times good night. I should first tell you how the prince, Claudio and my master, saw this amiable encounter.  
  
NOIN/CONRADE: And they thought Margaret was Hero?  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: The prince and Claudio did. My master knew she was Margaret. Claudio left, encraged and he swore he would shame her the next morning and send her home without a husband.  
  
IZZY: That's it. I don't understand the first half of that scene. Oh well. On to the next scene! Hilde, Sailor Uranus and Neptune bring us into scene four. Kay?  
  
HILDE, SAILOR URANUS and SAILOR NEPTUNE: *get on stage*  
  
IZZY: Act III, scene IV: Hero's Apartment. Action!  
  
HILDE/HERO: Ursula, wake my cousin Beatrice and bid her come.  
  
URANUS/URSULA: I will, lady.  
  
IZZY: Exit, Uranus.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: I think this is better.  
  
HILDE/HERO: NO, I'll wear this.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: That's not as good; I bet your cousin will say so.  
  
HILDE/HERO: My cousin's a fool and you are another; I'll wear nothing but this.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: I saw the Duchess of Milan's gown.  
  
HILDE/HERO: They say it exceeds most.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: Yours is much lovlier.  
  
HILDE/HERO: God give me joy to wear it!  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: Lady Beatrice comes.  
  
IZZY: Enter Beatrice.  
  
HILDE/HERO: Good day, cousin.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Good day, Hero.  
  
HILDE/HERO: Do you speak in the sick tune?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I think I am out of all other tunes. It's almost five o'clock. It's about time you were ready.  
  
HILDE/HERO: These gloves, the count sent me; they are an excellent perfume.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I am stuffed; I cannot smell. I am sick.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: You should use some of this distilled Carduus Benedictus and lay it to your heart.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Benedictus! why Benedictus? Do you have some moral in this Benedictus?  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: Moral! No, I mean the plain holy-thistle. You may think that I think you are in love; no, I am not such a fool to think what I list; nor I cannot think that you are in love, or that you will be in love or that you can be in love. Yet Benedick was such another and now he is a man: he swore that he would never marry; and yet, I think you look with your eyes like other women do.  
  
IZZY: Uranus, you re-enter.  
  
URANUS/URSULA: Madam, the prince, the count, Signior Benedick, Don John and all the gallants of the town have come to bring you to church.  
  
HILDE/HERO: Hurry, help me dress.  
  
IZZY: That's it for that scene. That's it for that Act! Yay!  
  
I'm trying to scrape up enough time to finish this. I'll try to get out an act everyday. My mom's gonna get really mad. I've been writing for who knows how long. See ya later,  
  
Izzy-chan  
  
  



	7. Act IV, Scene I

Much Ado About Nothing: Act IV, Scene I  
By Izzy  
Rated PG13  
  
Nothing much to say this time. The g-boys & co. do not belong to me. Neither does the play. On with the show.  
  
IZZY: This act is 11 pages long, the first scene being nine pages. Let's just do both because of the shortness of the second scene. A lot of people are in the first scene. Let's see ... *looks down at script* Wufei, Trowa, Treize, Quatre, Duo, Heero, Hilde, and Relena. Okay? Everyone on stage! Act IV, scene I: a church. Action!  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Come, Friar Francis, be brief.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: You come here, lord, to marry this lady.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: No.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: To be married to her: friar, you come to marry her.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: Lady, you come to be married to this count.  
  
HILDE/HERO: I do.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: If either of you know any impediment who you should not be joined, I charge you to speak it.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Do you know any, Hero?  
  
HILDE/HERO: None, my lord.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: How about you, count?  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: I dare make his answer: none.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Stand by, friar. Father: Will you with a free and unconstrained soul give me this maid, your daughter?  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: As freely as God did give her me.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: And what do I have to give back?  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Nothing.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Leonato, take her back again. Behold how like a maid she blushes here! What authority and show of truth can cunning sin cover itself! She knows the heat of a luxurious bed; her blush is guiltiness not modesty.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: What do you mean, lord?  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I wish not to be married.   
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Sweet prince, why do you not speak?  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Why should I speak? I stand dishonored.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Are these things spoken?  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Spoken and true.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: This doesn't look like a wedding.  
  
DUO: *breaking character* Duh!!!!  
  
IZZY: Back off Duo. Keep on going.  
  
HILDE/HERO: True? Oh God!  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: What man talked with you yesterday at your window between twelve and one.  
  
HILDE/HERO: I talked with no man at that hour.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Leonato, I am sorry that you must hear: upon my honor, myself, my brother and this greived count did see her, hear her at that hour with a ruffian at her chamber-window; who has indeed, most like a villain, confessed the vile encounters they have had a thousand times in secret.  
  
HILDE/HERO: *swoons*  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: How now, cousin! What sinks you down?  
  
TROWA/DON JOHN: Come, let us go.  
  
IZZY: Exit Wufei, Trowa and Duo.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: How is the lady.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Dead, I think. Help uncle! Hero! why Hero! Uncle! signior Benedick! Friar! How now, cousin Hero!  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: Have comfort, lady.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Do not live, Hero; do not open your eyes: For I did think you would not die quickly.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Sir, sir, be patient.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: On my soul, my cousin is belied!  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Were you her bedfellow last night?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: No, althought, until last night, I have for twelve months been her bedfellow.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Would the two princes and Count Claudio lie? Let her die.  
  
DUO: *interrupting yet again* Why does her own father want her to die?  
  
IZZY: BECAUSE! He doesn't want to live with the dishonor, you moron!  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: Hear me; I have noticed a thousand blushings and in her eye there has appeared a fire, to burn the errors that these princes hold against her maiden truth. Lady, what man are you accused of?  
  
HILDE/HERO: I know none.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: There is some strange misprison in the princes.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: They have the very bent of honor; the practice of it lies in Don John.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: If they speak truth of her, these hands shall tell her; if they wrong her honor, they proudest of them shall hear of it.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: Pause awhile, and let me counsel you. The princes left your daughter here for dead: let here be secretly be kept in and publish that she is dead. Maintain a mourning ostentation, and hang mournful epitaphs and do all rites that appertain unto a burial.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: What shall become of this?  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: This shall be on her behalf. It will fare with Claudio: when he shall hear she died upon his words, the idea of her lie shall sweetly creep into his study of imagination; and every lovely organ of her life shall come in more precious habit than when she lived; then he shall mourn and wished he had not accused her so. The supposition of the lady's death will quench the wonder of her infamy.   
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Signior Leonato, let the friar advise you. I will deal in this.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR: Come, Lady Hero, die to live.  
  
IZZY: Great! Everyone exits except for Benedick and Beatrice.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Yes and I will weep a while longer.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I will not desire that.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: You have no reason; I do it freely.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Surely I do believe your fair cousin is wronged.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: How much the man should deserve of me that righted her!  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Is there any way to show such friendship?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: A very even way, but no such friend.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: May a man do it?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: It is a man's office, but not yours.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: *deep breath in* I do love nothing in the world so well as you: isn't that strange?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: It were as possible for me to say I loved nothing so well as you: but do not believe me; and yet I do not lie; I confess nothing, nor I deny nothing. I am sorry for my cousin.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: By my sword, Beatrice, I swear you love me.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Do not swear and eat it.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I will swear by it that you love me; and I will make him eat it that says I do not love you.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Will you not eat your word?  
  
HEERO/BEATRICE: I protest I love you.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Why, then, God forgive me!  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: What offense, sweet Beatrice?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: You have stayed with me in a happy hour: I was about to protest I loved you.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: And do it with all your heart.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I love you with so much of my heart, that none is left to protest.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Come, bid me do anything for you.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Kill Claudio.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Ha! not for the wide world.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: You kill me to deny it. Farewell.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Wait, sweet Beatrice.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I am gone though I am here: there is no love in you: please, let me go.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Beatrice-  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I will go.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: We'll be friends first.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: You dare to be friends with me than fight with my enemy.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Is Claudio your enemy?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Did he not dishonor my kinswoman? O that I were a man! O God, that I were a man! I would eat his heart in the market place.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Hear me, Beatrice-  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Talk with a man out a window! A proper saying!  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: No, but, Beatrice-  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Sweet Hero! She is wronged!  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Beat-  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: O that I were a man for his sake! I cannot be a man with wishing, therefore I will die a woman with grieving.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Wait, good Beatrice. By this hand, I love you.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Use it for my love some other way than swearing by it.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Do you think in your sould that Count Claudio has wronged Hero?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Yes, as sure as I have a thought or a soul.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I will challenge him. I will kiss your hand, and so I leave you. By this hand, Claudio shall render me a dear account. As you hear of me, so think of me. Go, comfort your cousin: I must say she is dead: and so, farewell.  
  
IZZY: That was wonderful guys. I could barely tell you were acting.  
  
DUO: *bust up laughing*  
  
SAILOR NEPTUNE: What is it this time?  
  
DUO: They *giggle* fogged up the *giggle* windows!  
  
EVERYONE: *busts up laughing*  
  
IZZY: Okay, Okay. Let's not make fun of them. Just because they fogged up the-  
  
EVERYONE: *laughs harder*  
  
IZZY: OKAY, OKAY. They get the picture. Everyone, forget the second scene. I'll see you tomorrow.  
  
Hey! I wanted to copy a little note from the script. It's about Beatrice:  
  
First performed in 1598, Much Ado About Nothing focuses on the love story of Claudio and Hero, but the volatile relationship between Beatrice and Benedick is much more compelling. Critic Dover Wilson calls Beatrice "the first woman in [English] literature ... who not only has a brain, but delights in the constant employment of it." Her sharp wit leads her to wage a war of words with Benedick, supplying much of the comic energy of the play. But when Hero is cruelly wronged by Claudio, Beatrice's wit and intelligence cannot defend her cousin's reputation; outraged at such injustice, she can only exclaim, "O God, that I were a man!" and convince Benedick to challenge Claudio. Though the couples are united in a conventionally comic ending, Much Ado About Nothing goes much deeper in exploring the tensions between the sexes in a society where female chastity is equated with virtue, and that virtue serves as the measure of a woman's worth.  
  
Well, what did ya think? I've gotta go. It's getting late.  
  
Izzy-chan  
  



	8. Act IV, Scene II

Much Ado About Nothing: Act IV, Scene II  
By Izzy  
Rated G  
  
I'm on a roll! How many parts have I gotten out this week? Eight? Nine? But I know it's a lot! I really had no choice though. I borrowed the book. I might not be coming out with more Gundam stories soon. I got really inspired by watching this thing on England's history on the History channel and it's about this girl who, well ... read it, if I ever get it out. If it does, it's gonna be under originals. I'll give you the rundown on it at the end. If you wanna know more or help me out, email me at prncssprsfne@yahoo.com. On with the show:  
  
IZZY: Guys this is gonna be the shortest practice yet but you guys got caught up over some fogged windows-  
  
EVERYONE: *little giggles*  
  
IZZY: We have to waste our own time. Cathrine, Lady Une, Sexton, First Watch, Second Watch, Watch, Noin and Dorothy! You guys are gonn abe in this scene. And I wanna see some acting this time. Don't just stand there! Act IV, scene II: a prison. Action!  
  
NOIN and DOROTHY: *sitting in chairs in the middle of the room*  
  
EVERYONE ELSE: *around them, Lady Une with a notepad*  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Is the whole assembly here?  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: Yes.  
  
SEXTON: Who are the malefactors?  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: My patron and me.  
  
SEXTON: Who are the offenders to be examined? Let them come before the master constable.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Yes, let them come before me. What are your names?  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Borachio.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: *turns to Lady Une* Write that down. Yours, sir?  
  
NOIN/CONRADE: Conrade.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Verges, write that down as well.  
  
FIRST WATCH: These men said that Don John was a villain.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Write down that Prince John is a villain.  
  
SEXTON: What else did you hear them say?  
  
SECOND WATCH: That one had received a thousand ducats from Don John for accusing the Lady Hero wrongfully.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Are you getting this, Verges?  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: Of course.  
  
SEXTON: What else?  
  
FIRST WATCH: And that Count Claudio did mean to disgrace Lady Hero in front of the whole assembly and not marry her.  
  
SEXTON: What else?  
  
WATCH: That is all.  
  
SEXTON: But there is something that you cannot deny: this morning Prince John secretly stole away and upon her accusation this morning Hero died from her grief. Master constable, bind these men and bring them to Leonato's. I will show him their examination.  
  
IZZY: Great! Exit Sexton.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Come, bind them.  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Away! *gets up and out of chair*  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Take them away.  
  
IZZY: That was good. Thanks for making my day.  
  
Short huh? About my story: it takes place in middle age England and it's about a young girl named Chelsea. Her parents and aunt and uncle were killed by the king for treason. Her cousin, a nine year old sickly girl named Anne is left in fourteen year old Chelsea's care. Anne is cared for by Chelsea and their neighbors for two years until one awful day. Anne stole an apple while Chelsea was bringing her to the market place. Anne gets away but the guards capture Chelsea and bring her to the king to be sentenced. By this time she is malnourished and at a loss of sleep. As irony is, Chelsea looks exactly like the dead queen, the king's wife. He takes pity for her and since she will not tell the guards where her cousin is, he makes her work as a scullery maid in the kitchen for free. Anne is helped by her neighbors. Half a year later, Chelsea is being taken care of by the head maid, Lily, and brought back to the king where he strikes up a deal with her. He will find her cousin and get her the best doctor if Chelsea will be his son's personal maid. She inquires him about her duties and he replies whatever his son wishes her to do. She must choose between her virtue or her cousin's life. What do you think? Tell me your ideas in the review.  
  
Izzy-chan  
  
  



	9. Act V, Scene I

Much Ado About Nothing: Act V, Scene I  
By Izzy  
Rated G  
  
Not much to say today. I have been neglecting writing my disclaimers thought. Um for all those parts, please don't sue me! The g-boys & co. do not belong to me. Neither does the play itself. No infringement intended.  
  
IZZY: Hey, guys! You know what you did yesterday-do it again. *turns to Quatre* I've been meaning to tell you this: you know how like all your parts are basically over?  
  
QUATRE: Yeah ...  
  
IZZY: You really don't have to come.  
  
QUATRE: You know what? I want to. *settles back on sofa*  
  
IZZY: Awwww! Thank you. *walks over and kisses him on his cheek, then plops down onto his lap*  
  
QUATRE: *puts on a smirk and gives Duo a look of triumph who hasn't had any luck with Hilde*  
  
DUO: *glares back*  
  
IZZY: Now, this is a very LONG scene. Treize and Milliardo start. Act V, scene I: Before Leonato's House. Action!  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: If you go on like this, you'll kill yourself.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Please, brother, stop your counsel.  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: Here comes the prince and Claudio.  
  
IZZY: Wufei, Duo-you heard him.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Good evening.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Good day.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Hear you my lords-  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: We are in haste, Leonato.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Some haste, my lord! Well, fare you well, my lord: Are you so hasty now?  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: No, do not quarrel with us old man.  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: If he could right himself with quarreling, some of us would lie low.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Who wrongs him?  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: You have wronged me-no, never lay your hand upon your sword: I do not fear you.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: If it should give your age such fear: my hand meant nothing to my sword.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: *smoke begins to come out of his ears* Never make sport of me, I do not speak like a fool. Know, Claudio, you have wronged my innocent child and me and I challenge you to trial of a man. I say you have belied my innocent child; your slander has gone through and through her heart, and she lies buried with her ancestors; save this of hers, framed by your villainy!  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: My villainy?  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Yours, Claudio, yours.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: You do not say right, old man.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: My lord, I'll prove it on his body if he dares.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Away! I have nothing to do with you.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: You have killed my child: you kill me, you shall kill a man.  
  
MILLIARDO/ANOTONIO: *steps in front of Leonato* He shall kill two of us.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Brother-  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: God knows I loved my niece and she is dead, slandered to death by villains.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Brother Antony-  
  
MILLIARDO/ANOTONIO: It is no matter; let me deal in this.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Gentlemen both, we will not wake your patience. My heart is sorry for your daughters death: but she was charged with nothing but it was true and very full of proof.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: My lord, my lord.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: I will not hear you.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No? I will be heard.  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: And he shall.  
  
IZZY: Exit Leonato and Antonio.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Here comes the man we went to seek.  
  
IZZY: Heero, enter.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Now, signior, what news?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Good day, my lord.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Welcome, signior.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: We almost had our noses snapped off by two old men without teeth.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Leonato and his brother. What do you think?   
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I came to seek you both.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: We have been up and down to seek you.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: He looks pale. Are you sick, or angry?  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I think he is angry indeed.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Shall I speak with you?  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Of course.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: *takes Claudio aside to speak to him* You are a villain; I will not joke. Do me right or I will protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Well, I will meet you.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: *joining in on the conversation* What, a feast? I'll tell you how Beatrice praised your wit the other day. I said you had a fine wit. 'True,' she said, 'a fine little one.' 'No,' I said, 'a great wit.' 'Certain,' she said, 'a wise gentle man. That I believe for he swore at thing to me on Monday night which he forswore on Tuesday morning; there's a double tongue; there's two.' Thus did she, an hour later, trans-shape your particular virtues: at last she concluded with a sigh, that you were the most proper man in Italy.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: For which she wept heartily and said she did not care.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Yes, that she did.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: When shall we set the text underneath you, 'Here dwells Benedick the married man'?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Fare you well boys: you know my mind. I will leave you to your gossip-like humor. You have killed a sweet and innocent lady.  
  
IZZY: Exit Heero.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: He is in earnest.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: In most profound earnest; and I'll bet you, for the love of Beatrice.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: And he has challenged you.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Most sincerely.  
  
IZZY: Enter Cathrine, Lady Une, the Watch with Noin and Dorothy.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Come, sir: if justice cannot tame you, she shall never weight more reasons to balance.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: How now? Two of my brother's men bound!  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Tell us their offense.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Yes, what have these men done?  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: They have committed false report, spoke untruths, belied a lady, and are lying knaves.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Who have you offended?  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Let me go no farther. I have deceived even your eyes: how your brother Don John incensed me to slander the Lady Hero; how you were brought into the orchard and saw me court Margaret in Hero's clothes: how you disgraced her, when you should marry her: my villainy they have upon record. The lady is dead upon my and my master's false accusation; I desire nothing but the reward of a villain.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Does this speech run like iron through your blood.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I have drunk poison while he uttered it.  
  
DUO: *in shock* Wait, I'm killing myself????  
  
IZZY: No you moron. You're being sarcastic.  
  
DUO: Oh.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Did my brother set you on this?  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Yes, and paid me richly.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Sweet Hero! Now your image does appear in the rare semblance that I loved at first.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Come, bring away the plaintiffs. By this time the Sexton has informed Signior Leonato of this matter.  
  
LADY UNE/VERGES: Look, here comes master Singior Leonato and the sexton too.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Who is the villain? Let me see his eyes.  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Look at me.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: So you are the man that has killed my innocent child.  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: Even I alone.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No, not so. You belie yourself. Here is a pair of honorable men and a third that has fled. I thank you for my daughter's death: it was bravely done.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Choose your revenge yourself; yet I sinned but in mistaking.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: So did I.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Yet my brother has a daughter and almost the copy of my child that's dead. And she alone is now heir to both of us. Give her the right you should have given her my cousin and so dies my revenge.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Oh kind sir! I do embrace your offer.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Tomorrow, then, I will expect your coming, to be face to face with Margaret who was packed in all this wrong.  
  
DOROTHY/BORACHIO: No, she was not. She did not know what she did when she spoke to me; she has always be just and virtuous.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: Pray you, examine him upon the point.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: I thank you for your care and honest pains.  
  
CATHRINE/DOGBERRY: And I thank you. Come, neighbor.  
  
IZZY: Exit Dogberry and Verges.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Until tomorrow lords, farewell.  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: Farewell my lords.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: We will not fail.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Tonight, I'll mourn with Hero.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Come on, we'll speak with Margaret.  
  
IZZY: Exit everyone, separately.  
  
That's it! I'll probably come out with one more part. *Big adrenaline rush* Wow!  
  
Izzy-chan  
  
  



	10. Act V, Scenes II, III, & IV

Much Ado About Nothing: Act V, Scenes II, III and IV  
By Izzy  
Rated G  
  
The g-boys and co. do not belong to me. Neither does the play. On with the last part ...  
  
IZZY: This is gonna wrap our practice up. Enter Heero and Sailor Neptune. Act V, Scene II: Leonato's garden. Action!  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Sweet Mistress Margaret, thank you for helping me to the speech of Beatrice.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: *flirting a little* Will you write me a sonnet in praise of my beauty?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I so high a style, that no man living shall overcome it, for you truly deserve it. I pray you, call Beatrice.  
  
NEPTUNE/MARGARET: I will call Beatrice.  
  
IZZY: Exit, Neptune. Get ready for your part Relena.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Sweet Beatrice, would you come when I called you?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Yes, signior and depart when you bid me.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: O, stay till then!  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: 'Then' is spoken; let me go with that which I came, with knowing what has passed between you and Claudio.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: *took a scared look at Milliardo and continued* Only foul words; and I will kiss you.  
  
RELENA: *gets a dreamy look in her eyes* Okayyyyy ...  
  
IZZY: Relena!!!! Look at the script. You don't go: Okayyyy ....  
  
RELENA: Oh. *sheepishly* Sorry. Couldn't help myself there.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Foul words is foul wind and foul wind is foul breath and foul breath is noisome. Therefore I will depart unkissed.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I must tell you plainly, Claudio undergoes my challenge and either I must hear from him shortly or I will subscribe him a coward. And, I pray you now, tell me for which of my bad parts did you first fall in love with me?  
  
DUO: *thinking* Why can't I just walk up and say that to Hilde. Man, I wish I had Heero's part.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: All of them together for they will not allow any good part to intermingle with them.  
  
NOIN: *holds Milliardo back*  
  
MILLIARDO: *tries to wrench out of Noin's hold to go strangle Heero*  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: But for which of my good parts did you suffer love for me?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Suffer love-a good epithet! I do suffer love for I love you against my will.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I spite of your heart, poor heart! If you spite it for my sake, I will spite it for yours.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: You and I are too wise to woo peaceably.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: There's not one wise man among twenty who will praise himself.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Tell me, how is your cousin?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Very ill.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: And you?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Very ill, too.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Here comes one in haste.  
  
IZZY: Enter, Sailor Uranus.  
  
URANUS/URSULA: Madam, you must come to your uncle. It has been proved that Lady Hero has been falsely accused. Will you come presently?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Will you go hear these news, signior?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: I will live in your heart, die in your lap and be buried in your eyes; and moreover, I will go with you to your uncle's.  
  
IZZY: Hey! That was great! And look! You didn't fog up the windows!  
  
EVERYONE: *giggles*  
  
IZZY: *goes to sit in Quatre's lap again* Now, Wufei, Duo and a couple tapers are in this scene. Act V, scene III: a church. Action!  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Is this Leonato's monument?  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: It is.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: *reading out of a scroll*   
Done to death by slanderous tongues  
Was the Hero that here lies:  
Death in the reward of her wrongs,  
Gives her fame which never dies.  
So the life that died with shame  
Lives in death with glorious fame.  
Now, good night!  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Thanks to you all and leave us. Good bye. Come, let us got to Leonato's.  
  
IZZY: That's it for that scene! Exit guys. Now this scene has almost everyone in it. *gets up and out of Quatre's lap and looks at script* Now, Treize, Milliardo, Heero, Relena, Sailor Neptune and Uranus, Quatre and Hilde are all in this scene. Act V, Scene IV: a room in Leonato's house. Action!  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: Didn't I tell you she was innocent?  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: Well, I am glad that things all sorted out.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: And so am I.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Well, gentlewomen all, withdraw into a chamber and when I send for you, come masked.  
  
IZZY: Exit, ladies, please.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: The prince and Claudio promised to visit me. You know your office brother: You must give my daughter to young Claudio.  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: And that I will do.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Friar, I must entreat your pains, I think.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: To do what signior?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: To bind me, or undo me; one of them. Signior Leonato, truth it is, your niece regards me with an eye of favor.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: It is true.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: And I do requite her with an eye of love.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: What's your will?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: My will is to joined in the state of honorable marriage today: good friar, I shall desire your help.  
  
DUO: Whoa! Did Heero just say that?  
  
IZZY: Shut the heck up Duo. It's not Heero. It's Benedick. Get over yourself.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: My heart is with your liking.  
  
QUATRE/FRIAR FRANCIS: And my help. Here comes the prince and Claudio.  
  
IZZY: You heard Quatre. Get it there.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Good day.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: Good day, prince, Claudio: are you going to marry my brother's daughter?  
  
IZZY: Exit Antonio.  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: Good day, Benedick. What's the matter?  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: I think he is in love. Here comes some.  
  
IZZY: Re-enter Antonio with all the ladies who are masked.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Which is the lady I must seize upon?  
  
MILLIARDO/ANTONIO: This is she and I give her to you.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Sweet, let me see your face.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: No, until you take her hand and swear to marry her.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Give me your hand: I am your husband if you like of me.  
  
HILDE/HERO: *unmasking* And when I lived, I was your other wife. And when you loved, you were my other husband.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: Another Hero!  
  
HILDE/HERO: One Hero died defiled, but I do live. *kisses Claudio*  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: The former Hero! Hero that is dead!  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: She died, my lord, while her slander lived.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Soft and fair, friar. Which is Beatrice?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: *unmasking* I answer to that name. What is your will?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Do you not love me?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Why, no; no more than reason.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Why then, your uncle and the prince and Claudio have been deceived; they swore you did.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Do you not love me?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Why, no; no more than reason.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: Whey, then my cousin, Margaret and Ursula are much deceived; for they swore you did.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: They swore you were almost sick for me.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: They swore that you were dead for me.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: It is no such matter. Then you do not love me?  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: No, truly, but in friendly recompence.  
  
TEREIZE/LEONATO: Come, cousin, I am sure you love the gentleman.  
  
DUO/CLAUDIO: And I'll swear that he loves her. Here's a paper, written in his handwriting, a halting sonnet of his own pure brain fashioned to Beatrice.  
  
HILDE/HERO: And here's another, written in my cousin's hand, stolen from her pocket, containing her affection for Benedick.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: A miracle! Here's our own hands against our hearts. Come, I will have you; but, by thsi light, I take you for pity.  
  
RELENA/BEATRICE: I would not deny yout; but, by this good day, I yield upon great persuasion; and partly to save your life, for I was told you were in a consumption.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Peace! I will stop your mouth. *kisses her*  
  
RELENA: *wraps arms around his neck*  
  
HEERO: *wraps arms around her waist*  
  
IZZY: *annoyed, begins tapping her foot* Okay, guys, that's enough.  
  
HEERO and RELENA: *ignores Izzy*  
  
IZZY: GUYS, I said that was enough.  
  
HEERO and RELENA: *keeps on ignoring Izzy*  
  
IZZY: Uranus, Neptune. A little help here.  
  
URANUS and NEPTUNE: *walks up to Relena and Heero and rips them apart*  
  
MILLIARDO: *puts back the shot gun he had previously loaded*  
  
WUFEI/DON PEDRO: How are you, Benedick, the married man?  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Come, come, we are friends: let's have a dance. We may lighten our own hearts and our wives' heels.  
  
TREIZE/LEONATO: We'll have dancing afterwards.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Prince, you are sad; get yourself a wife.  
  
IZZY: Enter a messenger.  
  
MESSENGER: My lord, your brother John is taken in flight and brought with armed men back to Messina.  
  
HEERO/BENEDICK: Do not think about him until tomorrow: I'll devise brave punishments for him. Strike up, pipers.  
  
IZZY: Now you guys dance, yadda yadda yadda, and exit. That's it!!!! Yay!!!!! I'll see you all tomorrow and we'll take it from the top.  
  
EVERYONE: *groans*  
  
IZZY: You guys are such big babies. I'll see you later. *exits*  
  
That's it! Yay! Oh well. I'm having a brain cramp. I'll see you all again soon. Buh-bye --- for now!!!  
  
Izzy-chan  
  



End file.
